With my graduation in less than two weeks, the reality of me becoming “bum” continues to shove my soon-to-be-unemployed self. But just like what everyone else told me, I deserve a break. I’ve earned it. Might as well make the most out of it.
However, circumstances arose that I considered having a job the soonest time possible. Meaning, no vacation, no rest. It was fine for me. I have dreamed of working and earning money and working and earning money… and working. I sometimes ask myself if this feeling would exist now, or will it persist? Because I am sure that I will get tired, get burned-out even. So, yes. I am longing for that chance that I will get hold of my time, and not the other way around–for it has been the way ever since I learned the difference between skirts and jumpers.
Even before this academic year started, I had many plans on how to spend my summer after graduation. Go hiking, go back to Sagada, meet all my friends and catch up with them, watch all the movies and series I have, finish reading all the books on the shelves, clean up all the papers and books and handouts accumulated in four years in college, and the list goes on. I tell you, I haven’t done 1% of it, HONESTLY. I have so much time, but all that I want to do now is to sleep. I cannot imagine how many hours of sleep I have missed in 14 years of studying.
Well, to get directly to the point (this happens when you talk to yourself), one of the things that I have planned out for summer is the Nazarite Training. Ate Mutya, my church mate at THE ROCK CHURCH, had told me about this waaay back. Given the human’s nature, when someone invites you to join a very exciting event, you can’t help but answer, “GO! I WILL JOIN YOU!” with all the conviction that you have. But when you are asked again after some time, I bet that you don’t even know how to respond.
I had intended to apply for a BPO company when I learned that there was an opening in their Human Resources Department. I had envisioned myself working in here: I love their office, the HR head is a Thomasian graduate, and the starting salary is not bad at all. It is my dream job. But there was something in me saying that I should not grab it, that it is not the path I should be taking. I was torn with my dream and that voice. So I prayed. And I got my answer.
A friend of Ate Mutya has a very kind heart to help out an individual who wants to attend the training. And guess who is blessed enough? *YOURS TRULY WAVES WILDLY* Yes, I will be joining the training. Yes, I am blessed. Yes, my prayer has been answered. I take it as a response to my confused mind. How? Because if I am to start a job, I won’t have the time to be in the training. That job was not for me. God has something better to provide.
“Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” – Mark 11:24 ESV
I know God used Ate Mutya’s friend to tell me that I am meant to be in the training; that I am to learn a lot of things; and that I am called to be a Nazarite. I am very excited for this because I know God truly approves. It feels so good to obey Him, even if that means letting go of a dream you had for the longest time. Really, you have to let go of certain things in your life for the greater ones coming.
If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.