“…For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.” -Luke 6:45
There are times that your mouth can just go all day, up to the point that your mind doesn’t have any control of the words anymore. You think you’re right but as a matter of fact, you’re hurting others. There’s no filter. The words aren’t thought of. And most of the times, you think they’ll be okay. But really, they are beyond the opposite.
Guilt. I was told that it is that nagging sense when you did something wrong. Asking for an apology is easy. I have done it numerous times. But if you know in your heart that it would complicate things, you will just step back and try not to be affected; in which you will fail to do 100% of the time.
Usually, I am the one who’s on that side. I’m the one who’s hurt. I’m the one who finds way to cope up with the misery. But if you, yourself, are causing the pain, it’s a very different story.
My course made me think more differently compared to how my brain works four years ago. Now, I see the bigger picture. I tend to anticipate what will happen next. And sometimes, I know, I can feel what they are feeling, too. “Sabi ko na mali yung course ko, eh.”
However, I think God led me to this current state of my being for one thing: To be humble. He made me realize that I don’t know everything. That these thoughts and actions should be surrendered to Him, to allow the Holy Spirit move in my life.
I am sad,
depressed even, that I am hurting people. Of course it happens. But the worst part is that you are causing them pain with the words and acts you conciously say and do.
Once said and done, you can’t take back anything. All that you can do is to pray for them, that they can get through it, still, trusting on the Lord.
Now, I apologize for the things I’ve ever done to anyone. I am sorry. I really am. Sometimes, I’m too full of myself that I forget you have feelings, too. I don’t intend to hurt anybody.
Sorry na, ha? 😐